Saturday, February 23, 2013

Dirty Bleach Mackenzie



Dirty Bleach Mackenzie (2012)






Dirty Bleach Mackenzie is a screenplay I wrote last year that is essentially a homage to 80s action cinema in the same way that Kill Bill was a homage to spaghetti western and eastern kung-fu films:

John Mackenzie is a former commando turned professional golfer who is trying to live a normal life in the 80s after having served in the Vietnam war. He is approached by his former mentor, the grizzly General Kirby, who wants him to go back into action to rescue a member of John's former unit whom John left to die in Vietnam. After thinking about it for about thirty seconds, John Mackenzie (codename 'Bleach') decides to strap on an ammo belt and take one last all-expenses paid vacation right into the shit.

How do I feel about it? It's a writer's first screenplay-- you can tell that because it is nearly three-hundred pages long (what was that Mark Twain quote about shorter letters?) It's pretty sloppy, and there are some weak points in it. Despite this though, I think that I managed to achieve about sixty-percent of what I wanted to in Dirty Bleach Mackenzie. There is a strong character arc, and there is also a subtle commentary on the way 80s action cinema conceptualised war.

My primary concern with Dirty Bleach Mackenzie was trying to convey how 80s action movies depicted violence. Think Arnie impaling the bad guy with a steaming pipe before delivering the one-liner "Let off some steam, Bennet!" 80s action movies were cool and badass, but they never seemed to address the emotional impact that continued violence had on their protags. At the end of Commando, Arnie gets both girls (his daughter and Cheech's) and you can bet your ass that when he gets home and puts child Alyssa Milano to bed, there is going to be a whole lot of fucking going on with his prize (the woman that he kidnapped at the beginning of the film, but managed to win over through the tragedy of his plight). Contrast that to say The Bourne Supremacy or The Bourne Ultimatum, in which Matt Damon is totally neurotic and prone to nightmares after his engagement in violent missions behind enemy lines.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not lambasting 80s action movies, and Dirty Bleach Mackenzie is not about saying: "Naughty, naughty 80s action movies, you shouldn't be glamorizing violence!" If anything, Dirty Bleach Mackenzie is a celebration of brutality-- shit, it certainly contains enough of it within its pages. What my screenplay does try to suggest is that these action heroes, the ones that we all looked up to as kids, are probably just a little bit fucked in the head because of the cool ultra-violent things that they have to participate in. Dirty Bleach Mackenzie depicts the slow mental unraveling of its protag in an anarchic and-- hopefully-- cool way. 

It probably needs to be edited-- I'd like to halve it essentially (so it is one-hundred and fifty pages long). I'll come back to it at some stage, make it tighter. However, I present it to you so that I may engage in film criticism without being a hypocrite. There are a lot of bad things you could say about Dirty Bleach Mackenzie, but hopefully there are some good things you could say as well.

If you want to read the entire screenplay, you can at Amazon Studios. Click here.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

In which the author of the blog explains its point.



Anyone else sick of the amount of critics that are out there on the web? I'm talking about people who bitch about books or movies without ever having the balls to submit anything creative themselves.


Hemingway had nothing but contempt for critics. He said that they were '...men who watch a battle from a high place then come down and shoot the survivors.' The older I get, the more I'm inclined to agree. 


Don't get me wrong, I think that criticism is necessary... No, necessary is the wrong word, I think that criticism is wonderful! Talking about the hidden meanings of works, and discussion about whether or not a particular work is effective or not it something that I would like to see flourish on the internet!


What I'm sick of seeing is a bunch of talentless mother-fuckers not putting their money where their mouths are. If you are going to rag on someone's art, you should have to submit something to the table yourself. I guess I think if you're going to lambast something shitty, you can't expect anyone to take you seriously unless you practice the craft and present some samples of your own. It's like a fat kid calling another fat kid tubby. If your ass can't swim, stay the fuck out of the pool.


In this spirit, I'm starting this little blog. I write fiction (screenplay and narrative prose) as a hobby, but I also like to talk about literature in the current zeitgeist. Here you will find my opinions on movies and books, but you'll also find some stuff that I am working on.


Feel free to send me an email or a comment letting me know what you think about my work. I would appreciate the feedback.

Until then, sit back, try and relax and enjoy what I have to offer.


- A.